


Captain Marvel vs. Brie Larson

by al_fletcher



Series: Captain Marvel Squared: The Complete Saga [3]
Category: Captain Marvel (2019), DC Extended Universe, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Shazam! (2019), Shazam! | Captain Marvel (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hollywood, Celebrity Paradox, Don't think too hard about it, Gen, Hollywood, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Justice League (2017), Shazam! (2019) Spoilers, The MCU and DCEU are Mutually Fictional
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:15:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 9,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24463369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/al_fletcher/pseuds/al_fletcher
Summary: All that time-travel in Endgame has had some effect on the timestream, and Vers finds herself in a world she never made. In the meantime, Billy Batson and Freddy Freeman are just trying to have a day out on Hollywood Boulevard when they run into a Captain Marvel that doesn't like them all that much.Ultimately, there's only one person on Earth that can help them out...(Part three of the senses-shattering 'Captain Marvel meets Captain Marvel' saga bringing together Billy Batson and Carol Danvers!)
Relationships: Billy Batson & Carol Danvers, Billy Batson & Freddy Freeman
Series: Captain Marvel Squared: The Complete Saga [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1360213
Comments: 9
Kudos: 20





	1. Earth-Prime, Hollywood Boulevard

**Earth-Prime**

_Hollywood Boulevard, Los Angeles_

“You were right, this is the best idea ever!”, Captain Marvel, also known as Shazam, also known as Billy Batson, said, to his companion Powerstorm.

His blue-attired friend Powerstorm, also known as Freddy Freeman, responded, “And you were _so_ doubtful. I mean, how else were we going to get to California? We never have to buy plane tickets again – ever – you realise that?”

“I dunno about that,” Billy said. “Aren’t people going to figure our identities out if they keep seeing us in the same place as…ourselves?”

“That’s why we just don’t switch out to our regular selves, Bill…Shaz… _Captain Marvel_ , and just find places where we won’t stand out,” Freddy said. “Like here! We just look like two really good cosplayers. See? There’s another Captain Marvel…uhh, Marvel style…there!”

He waved at the blonde in a green outfit across the road, who eventually returned it. Freddy turned back to face Billy, beaming with self-satisfaction.

“So what, you mean we just don’t transform the whole time we’re here?”, Billy asked.

“Exactly! Then we just go back to Philly, change back, and just claim we were somewhere else in case anybody asks. It’s foolproof!”

“Yeah,” Billy said, “but how do we explain it to Mary?”

“Explain what?” Freddy asked. “She’s got the same powers we do, more or less. Sure, she’ll lecture us for like an hour about ‘secret identities’ and ‘flagrant use of powers for frivolous purposes’ but then she’ll eventually realise like it’s the easiest way to get around _anywhere_ , and she’ll be thanking us for saving on air fare forever.”

“You know what, that makes way too much sense for me to waste time complaining about,” Billy conceded. “So! Mary’s classes end at like 4, so there’s no point heading up to CalTech until then, which leaves us…”

As Billy stared at an imaginary wristwatch, Freddy finished his thought, saying, “A good like five hours, maybe four if we’re going to take the bus up to Pasadena. You brought enough for bus fare, right?”

“Yeah,” Billy said, now looking for an imaginary wallet. “Wait, I left all the money in my wallet in my regular self’s pants, and this super suit doesn’t have pockets. Did you bring your backpack?”

Freddy made a mocking show of looking over his shoulder for an imaginary backpack, “No, I did not, Billy. Okay, you go into an alley and transform where nobody can see you, get the money and pass it to me, and we’ll find something to hold it in later.”

“You got it,” Billy said, ducking into a nearby alley as Freddy waited on the main street, unaware of the figure spying on them from the corner of a Hooters close by.

The figure watched, from a distance, the red-suited superhero ducking into an alley, a flash of light illuminating it for a moment, then a teenager emerging with a wallet in hand, which he passed to his blue-suited companion, then the teenager running back in and the red-suited fellow emerge, whereupon they started heading towards the nearest In-and-Out.

These guys weren’t even trying.

Billy and Freddy were destined to never reach that In-and-Out, nor were they ever going to reach Pasadena to bother their elder sister, Mary Bromfield, as destiny was about to hit them in the face right on that very street, although they didn’t realise it until they passed by that other Captain Marvel again, who blinked at them as they crossed paths.

“Huh, I think we saw her just now,” Billy thought aloud.

“Yeah, maybe,” Freddy said as he counted out bills. “Hey, you know what? You should totally ask her for a selfie.”

“Why?”, Billy asked.

“It’d be awesome! Like, two Captain Marvels in one photo. People would be seeing double! Let me get her attention. Hey, ma’am—”

Even as they turned around, Billy felt a chill wind suddenly rise in the hot midday air as he realised she hadn’t really been walking away after they passed each other, and in fact had been staring at the two of them with deadly intent for the past few seconds.

“Uh, miss, are you…”, Billy asked, trailing off.

“You really thought that this would work?”, the Captain Marvel cosplayer asked. “Who the heck are you guys supposed to be anyway? Red Superman and Blue Superman?”

Freddy leant to whisper to him, “No, I don’t think she’s okay, Billy.”

He began, “Okay, miss, I don’t know what your issue here is, but we don’t want any trouble or anything, so let’s just go our separate ways…”

“No,” Vers said, “I’m taking you in, _Skrulls_.”

Billy protested, “’Skrull’? Hey, what do you m–”

He never finished the sentence as the Kree officer drew herself up to him and smashed her forehead against the bridge of his nose, causing them both to recoil. Freddy grabbed her by the shoulder, fist flying, but suddenly felt her heel on his hip, then found himself flying backwards until he smashed into a nearby wall.

Vers strode over to him, dragging Freddy up by his collar, hissing, “Resist arrest. I _beg_ you.”

They locked stares for a brief moment, and Vers nearly had the game given away when Freddy’s gaze wavered, looking over her shoulder. Before she could whip around to stop Billy, a garbage can enveloped her head from above and she felt her arms held fast by the two (supposed) Skrulls.

“Okay, _now!_ ”, she heard, then suddenly felt herself getting spun around and around and around on the spot, getting very giddy in the process, then was…airborne? Although the garbage can fell off her head, that didn’t help much as the world around her was revolving like a crazy kaleidoscope, until she felt her waist jammed by something very tall, very high up, and the red and blue guys just specks in the spinning skyline.

Billy and Freddy flew back towards LA, leaving their assailant stuck in the crook of the Y in the Hollywood sign, shouting at each other, panicked.

“I don’t think that was just any cosplayer, Freddy!”, Billy screamed.

“You _think_?!”, Freddy retorted. “She must think she’s the actual Carol Danvers, but like, the 1995 version, crazy about hunting Skrulls!”

“Wait, hang on,” Billy mused, “what if she _is_ the 1995 Carol Danvers?”

“What do you mean, ‘she _is_ the 1995 Carol Danvers’?!”, Freddy yelled back, quieting down as they landed on the roof of Graumann’s Chinese Theatre, “You think she somehow got here the way we got into the MCU, or back?”

“Yeah, but like, with time travel as well,” Billy said.

“So you’re telling me,” Freddy said exasperatedly, “that not only do we need to get her to the Rock of Ages, but we also need to send her _back_ to 1995?”

“I guess…”, Billy said.

“This isn’t good,” Freddy said. “I don’t want to go back there and destroy the rest of the letters in the sign by fighting her, since she’s like S-Tier power level, and we can’t fight her here in Hollywood or it’ll be Metropolis levels of carnage and I’m too young and impressionable to have that kind of blood on my hands. Either the sign or the people.”

“I guess we have to lure her out, somehow, and fight her where we won’t bother too many people,” Billy said. “By the way, did you hang on to my wallet?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah, hooked it on the corner of the cloak,” Freddy said, returning it to Billy. “But I think I dropped like twenty bucks when she attacked us.”

“ _Freddy!_ ”, Billy cursed.

“Hey, _you_ try multitasking when a superpowered Kree-human-hybrid-woman tries to turn your face into mashed potato with her forehead!”

“That was _me_ and _my face!_ ”

“Potato, potahto,” Freddy muttered, dismissing him. “Anyway, you got a plan?”

“I think I just might,” Billy said. “But we’re going to need just _one_ thing.”

Freddy asked, “What’s that?”

“My phone,” Billy said, answering him authoritatively.

“…also in your normal self’s pants?”

“A-yup.”


	2. Earth-Prime, The Hall of Justice

**The Hall of Justice, GRID Server Room**

Victor Stone, once famous in his own right but now best known to the world as Cyborg, part-man part-machine superhero and founding member of the Justice League, stood suspended in the server room that connected the League’s systems to those of the rest of world, where they served as millions of eyes and ears observing every corner of it and watching out for emergencies which only the League could confront.

To any mere mortal with the processing power of the average human brain, such a massive flood of data would either be overwhelming to their consciousness or simply breeze past them unheeded, with nothing gained from trying to see and hear so much at once. It was just as well that the ordeal of cyberneticisation had brought with it the ability to not only absorb so much information at once, but also make some sense out of it.

Which is why it was that much more annoying when he started getting a phone call.

A holographic projection popped up in front of his human eye, letting him identify the caller, who was one “BATSON, W.”, i.e. Shazam (or Captain Marvel as he sometimes called himself, infringement lawsuits be damned), the newest recruit to their ranks and, also being a teenager in everyday life, someone who managed to get himself in unique kinds of trouble. This was unlikely to be much different.

Sighing, he accepted it.

“Hi, Billy,” he said. “What’s the matter?”

“ _No time to explain!_ ”, a panicked voice rang out over the line. “I need two things, ASAP.”

“All…right…”, Cyborg said, asking, “What are they?”

“ _First off, I need a Captain Marvel costume, the Marvel one, not the me one, I’ve gone the one I’m wearing, obviously, but I’m talking Carol Danvers_ ,” Billy detailed, “ _and secondly, I need Brie Larson’s address._ ”

There was a very long, very poignant pause on both ends of the line. Finally, Cyborg mustered up some words to say, which weren’t very kind at all.

“Dude, that’s _disgusting_.”

“ _I-what-_ no! _I don’t mean it in that way, man!_ ”, Billy protested.

“Then what _do_ you mean?” Cyborg asked. “I think you actually do have time to explain.”

“ _Okay, look_ ,” Billy’s voice said. “ _Fred-I mean Powerstorm and I were attacked in Hollywood by her…an…alien doppelganger that thinks she’s Captain Marvel and, worse yet, has her power level, and we don’t want to deal with her anywhere crowded. So, we’re going to get Ms. Larson’s help in luring her out somewhere secluded. Is that better?_ ”

“It’s not _worse_ ”, Cyborg admitted, “but are you sure that-”

“ _Positive!_ ”, Billy shouted. “ _Look, you can see through like, every security camera in the world, right?_ ”

“When you put it that way that kind of cheapens it, but yeah.”

“ _Alright! Go to like ten minutes ago, the street corner near the Hooters where the Chinese Theatre is. You’ll understand once you see the footage._ ”

Victor closed his human eye and scanned through all the angles he could get of the events that Billy was alluding to, and sure enough, there was the would-be Captain Marvel throwing him and his friend ‘Powerstorm’ (alias Freddy Freeman) around like ragdolls until Billy pulled a move right out of _Skyrim_ and threw a garbage can over her head before the two of them spun her around and took to the skies with her.

“Okay, I see it,” Victor said. “Uh, where did you put her?”

“ _The ‘Y’ on the Hollywood sign. She might have already gotten down._ ”

Victor clicked his tongue in contemplation. “Right, thanks for taking care of her, Billy. I’ll drop a line to Wonder Wo-”

“ _No!_ ”, Billy protested. “ _Diana is awesome and everything, but I don’t know if she’ll get here in time. Our so-called ‘Captain Marvel’ is under the impression that Freddy and I are Skrulls, and she might tear apart all of Hollywood looking for us in the guise of other people._ ”

Victor thought in silence for a good long while (by his supercomputer standards), running through all the possibilities, ultimately concluding that wasting time arguing with Billy was probably the biggest hazard out of everything right now, and got back to him a few seconds later.

“All right, Billy,” Victor said. “You’ve proven yourself against Sivana like, twice, and Black Adam once, _and_ also stopped Lex Luthor and his clowning with us, so I know this isn’t going to be a _terrible_ plan, but God so help me, if you get _one_ hair on Brie Larson’s head harmed by your bogus Captain Marvel…”

“ _Pinky swear_ ,” Billy said, “ _Promise_.”

“ _I promise too!_ ”, Freddy’s voice said.

“Okay then. I’ll forward the coordinates to your phone, and with regards to the costume…you said you were on the roof of the TCL Chinese Theatre?”, Victor asked.

“ _That’s right_.”

“I’m going to need you to stick your right hand out in exactly five minutes.”

Billy asked, astounded, “ _You can drop it_ that _precisely_?”

“Yup,” Victor answered with obvious pride. “But if you don’t catch it, it’s going to bounce something _fierce_ into the road, so…”

“ _Relax_ ,” Billy said. “ _Five minutes, right_?”

“Yeah. Set a timer,” Victor said, signing off. After another short burst of calculations, he started calling Diana’s cell, _just_ in case…


	3. Earth-Prime, Hollywood Boulevard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> N.B. I do not know where Brie Larson lives or will live in 2024, nor do I know who she is with or will be with in 2024 either. The story sets her in Santa Clarita as a plot convenience.

_Hollywood Boulevard, Exactly 300 seconds later_

“Heads up, Billy!”, Freddy shouted, spying the drone-dropped package from afar.

True to Cyborg’s word, the canister fell out of the air right into Billy’s outstretched hand, where it rapidly cooled off as he tossed it from hand to hand and tried his best not to swear at the shock of how hot it had gotten falling through the air.

“You doing okay there?” Powerstorm asked, concerned.

“Yeah,” Billy said, waving his free hand, “it just was – ah, flip – a bit warmer than I thought it would be. Okay, it’s cooled off now. Give Cyborg a call, will you?”

“What do you want me to ask?”, Freddy asked Billy.

Inspecting the canister, he replied, “Well, how you open this darned thing, for a start.”

Connecting, Freddy made some sounds of comprehension in reaction to Cyborg’s instructions after explaining his enquiry, turning back to Billy after ending the call.

“So?”

“Just turn the cap anticlockwise. It’ll self-iron as it comes out. He says it’s a ‘screen-accurate replica’ of the one in her movie.”

“Green or red?”, Billy asked.

“I dunno, I didn’t ask,” Freddy said. “So, now what?”

“We go over to hers. Just hold on to my phone and give me directions, I’ll hang on to this.”

With that, they took to the skies, heading north.

* * *

_Brie Larson's House, Santa Clarita_

“Alright, let’s take it from the top again, Scene 17,” Brie Larson, the MCU’s Carol Danvers and worldwide feminist icon said, holding her copy of the ‘sides’ script to _Captain Marvel versus The Guardians of the Galaxy_.

Her partner read off their photocopy, simulating Star-Lord’s line, “Chris says, ‘Hey, it’s you! That Kree supercop!’.”

“That is…seriously outdated news,” Brie said, “I’m my own woman now. Didn’t we see each other on Earth?”

“‘Maybe’, Chris says, ‘It was _kind of_ hectic down there’, then Groot says, ‘I am Groot’. Then _Rocket_ goes, ‘That’s right! Weren’t you the one that blasted practically all of his ships out of the sky?’”

“That’s me,” Brie said, reciting the script.

“‘Well, thanks, I guess,’ Rocket says. Then Chris is going to interject, saying, ‘What he said. But if you’re not working for the Kree anymore, what do you want to do with us?’”

“We need to talk about a certain Adam Warlock,” she said. “and my last line’s going to be, ‘Specifically, your last interaction with the Sovereign.’ Then everyone starts getting tense.”

“…Hold on, dear,” her partner said, looking over at the monitor by the kitchen. “We’ve got guests. Are you expecting anyone?”

“No,” Brie said. “I’m meant to be going for the table read in about half an hour already. Just arm the security system, to be safe. What do they look like?”

Her partner squinted at the security monitor, saying, “Uh, It looks like Shazam and…blue Shazam, actually.”

Brie’s brow furrowed in puzzlement. “DC cosplayers? God, I hope they’re not here to pull some kind of dumb stunt. Are they doing anything in particular?”

“They’re waiting for us to open the door, as far as I can tell. You want me to get it?”

“I can handle it,” Brie said, getting up, and opening it to reveal, as her partner had said, two guys dressed like the folks from _Shazam!_ , the red-attired one of whom was carrying a canister. She looked them over before asking, “Can I help you?”

“Yes, you can, in fact, Ms. Larson,” Shazam said. “I’m Shaz-uh, Captain M-well, _Captain Thunder_ , and this is my colleague Powerstorm and there’s an emergency that literally only you can help us with.”

“ _Right_ ,” she said sceptically. “Nice meeting you, Captain Shazam, but I have to be go-”

“Wait!!”, Billy protested, looking at Freddy and both of them nodding as they shouted, “ _Shazam!_ ”

One blinding thunderbolt later, the dust settled, leaving two teenagers in front of her doorstep, the one who had replaced Shazam saying, “See, Ms. Larson? We’re the real deal.”

“Ok…ay, I believe you,” Brie said, astounded. “Wow. Why don’t you come inside? And call me Brie.”


	4. Earth-Prime, Brie Larson's House

Inside Brie Larson's House

“So, uh, this is Shazam also known as Captain Thunder, and his friend Powerstorm,”, Brie said to her partner, leading them in, “and this is my significant other,” she said, introducing Billy and Freddy.

“Hi there, I’m Billy.”

“I’m Freddy.”

Sitting down, Brie weaved her fingers together, asking them, “So, what do two superheroes need with me?”

“Alright,” Freddy said, “but just be warned that this might just blow your mind.”

“What do you mean?”, she asked.

“While I could say that we need your help dealing with an alien doppelganger of you that tried to beat the crap out of us,” Billy said, “I think it’s best that you know the truth.”

“And that being…?”, Brie asked, getting impatient.

“The MCU? Everything that happened in it? From _Iron Man_ all the way to the Snap and after that when you kicked Thanos’ ass?”, Freddy said, waving his hands mysteriously, finishing, “it’s all true.”

Brie’s eyes narrowed. “‘It’s all true’? Are you saying that all the things that we wrote and shot happened somewhere else? How’s that even possible?”

“That’s the part that the best minds on both sides are still trying to figure out,” Billy said, “but what it comes down to is that there’s another world entirely in which Carol Danvers, Captain Marvel, is a real, physical person and we” – he gestured to Freddy and himself – “are fictional characters played by actors.”

“Wait,” Brie asked, “do _I_ exist over in that other world?”

“No,” Freddy answered.

“But then…”, she trailed off.

“I had a chat with Spider-Man about this on the way to New Asgard,” Freddy explained, “so like since _Scott Pilgrim_ exists in both of our worlds, Envy Adams is played by Billie Piper.”

“The _Doctor Who_ actress?”, Brie asked. “Wait, then who plays Lucas Lee, since Chris Evans is Captain America?”

“Scott Eastwood,” Freddy said. “While Ramona Flowers was played by Olivia Thirlby in our world, their version looks unnervingly like that Mafia princess that shot a bunch of people in Gotham City with a crossbow.”

“So the rule is that as long they’ve been in the MCU, their actor doesn’t exist in that world?”, Brie asked.

“Seems that way,” Freddy explained. “Outside of Scott Pilgrim, their version of _Marriage Story_ has Amber Heard in it. That, ah, aged really poorly really quickly.”

“Indulge me for a second here,” Brie said. “Who won my Oscar?”

“I don’t know, actually,” Freddy thought. “Katherine Waterston, maybe?”

“Huh,” Brie mused, shrugging her shoulders. “Right, but what does this all mean? You said something about an ‘alien doppelganger’?”

“Yeah, about that,” Billy said. “So about ten minutes ago, we ran into the you from the other world. Now, this normally wouldn’t be an issue since we’ve both met you – I mean, present day Carol Danvers before.”

“Wait, you’ve been there? Or she’s been here before?”

“The first of those two. This is the first time anyone we know from that side’s come over here, besides an army of evil elves,” Billy recounted.

“An army of evil elves…all right, I’m going to guess that’s a story for another time.”

“Yeah, we’ve got something more urgent on our hands here,” Billy said. “Right now, the version of you, I mean her, from the beginning of your movie is here and she, uh, kind of thinks that we’re Skrulls.”

“Oh, wait, let me get the footage Cyborg recorded,” Freddy said, pulling out Billy’s phone and showing it to the rest of them, complete with headbutt, kick to the hipbone, and garbage-can-over-the-head manoeuvre.

Brie’s eyes shifted from the screen to the other two, narrowing suspiciously as she asked, “And _why_ exactly does she think you’re Skrulls?”

Billy sucked in his breath, admitting, “She _might_ have seen me transform from my superpowered self to myself. And back.”

“So, really,” Brie said, “Your incredible bad luck in changing bodies in the view of someone who hadn’t gotten enough character development to go beyond punching Skrulls on trains is what brought you here.”

“That is…precisely it,” Billy said.

“There’s still something I don’t get,” Brie said. “That version of me has got to be from, like, 1995. Does whatever way that you use to get there and back let you time travel?”

“It doesn’t,” Freddy answered. “I was trying to figure out how that could happen, and the only thing I can think of is that the MCU’s timestream got bent into all kind of weird knots after _Endgame_ and Cap’s time-travelling quest for granny tang-

Brie interrupted, disgustedly, “Literally never say that phrase again-”

“…and the resulting time distortions must have produced all sorts of weird time tumours-”

“Once again, _no_ , since you’re describing a version of me-”

“…leading to the 1995 version of you being displaced not just to the present, but _our_ present. So, we not only have to get you, well, her back to the MCU, we probably need to bring her back to the past using the time machine Cap had, assuming that’s still there.”

Brie blinked as she absorbed Freddy’s theory. “Well, that doesn’t sound completely impossible except for all the parts that do. Regardless, there’s someone out there with my face and you guys need to take care of her.”

“That’s right,” Billy said. “We need to hurry, or she’ll start hunting down any random two people acting like us, all across Hollywood.”

“Trust me, I’ve yet to run into anyone _exactly_ like you guys,” Brie said, asking, “Still, what’s your plan?”

“I’m glad you asked,” Billy said, holding up the canister.


	5. Earth-Prime, Vasquez Rocks National Park

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which William Batson and Frederick Freeman make their MCU directorial debut.

_Earth-Prime, Vasquez Rocks National Park_

“Alright,” Brie said, dressed in her Captain Marvel uniform, looking over at Billy and Freddy in their superhero forms, “Maybe I take it back a little bit about this not being the worst plan.”

“It’ll be fine,” Billy said reassuringly. “There’s two…three…of us and one of her, and this way we won’t need to worry about damaging anything too much when we inevitably have to fight her.”

“Yeah, but…”, Brie protested, “…you said you’re going to be filming this and broadcasting this into every TV screen and smartphone in Hollywood?”

“Yeah!”, Freddy said. “Cyborg’s connected to every network there is in the world. There’s no way your doppelganger from the MCU won’t be able to notice, and if we film it with those rocks in the background she’s bound to remember where this is!”

Brie turned around, looking at the iconic rock formation. “Well, maybe she watched _Star Trek_ at some point. _Probably_ should just spell it out in case she doesn’t get the point. But you’re saying thousands of people are going to get this projected through their screens involuntarily?”

“That’s the idea,” Freddy said.

“And me in full costume,” Brie said, looking down at her suit. “I am going to be getting _some_ _interesting_ calls from Mr. Feige and company. Can’t be helped if this is the best option left.”

“Cyborg said he was going to call Wonder Woman, but I think we can handle things just fine,” Billy said proudly.

“Alright, one-on-one, I don’t know if…you know what? We can figure that that one out later. Can I go over the script one more time?”

“No time for that!”, Freddy said, holding up the enormous placards which he’d written over in marker, ordering his brother, “Billy, get the camera rolling.”

“By which you mean my phone, but alright,” Billy said, holding it up to film Brie as Captain Marvel.

Her eyes darted over to the first placard, and desperately resisted rolling, before trying to give her best interpretation of the dialogue a 17-year-old had cooked up for her.

“Greeting, true believers,” she said, putting in a tone of faux-authority in her voice, “It’s me, Captain Marvel, reporting in from Vasquez Rocks, and I have an important announcement for all of you.”

Billy formed a big thumbs-up with his free hand as Freddy changed cards.

“Some of you might have already noticed someone who looks an awful lot like me hanging out around Hollywood,” Brie said, gesturing to her right at where a picture-in-picture would presumably be inset.

At this Billy frantically started pointing to his right and her left, whereupon she switched sides without skipping a beat, continuing, “As you might have guessed, that’s not me, but a Skrull straggler, and I need _your help_ ” – she pointed directly at the lens here – “to help me find her.”

Billy was practically grinning ear to ear, nodding in obvious approval, as Freddy switched cards again, and Brie was suppressing a massive internal groan.

“All you need to do is log in to your official Marvel app,” she said, miming holding up a smartphone, “and send your photo in, as well as your geo-hash, and you’ll also get to see all the sightings of my impersonator! One lucky winner with the best picture will get a special signed prize, from yours truly.”

The last placard came up, with just one word.

Brie tried to remember to smile with her eyes as she managed her signoff. “Excelsior!”

Billy stopped recording, and brought the phone down, clapping appreciatively, as Brie exhaled, finally being able to do without the preppy façade.

He exclaimed, “That was awesome!”

“Wasn’t too bad,” Brie said, trying not to hurt his feelings. “Okay, give me a couple of minutes and we can do another take.”

Billy and Freddy traded glances, before Freddy asked, “Another…take?”

“We, uh, sent that footage to Cyborg already,” Billy said. “It’s probably already _en route_ to a whole bunch of smartphones and TV screens everywhere between Hollywood and Santa Clarita to here, to be honest.”

“ _What?!_ ”, Brie screeched, bugging out a little. “I-you-I wasn’t even pointing the right way the first time round. I didn’t even have a phone to demonstrate! Are you guys kidding me?!”

“We’ll-we'll fix it in post!”, Billy said instinctively. “If your producers give you trouble for an unauthorised MCU production, just tell them to drop the Justice League a line and they’ll explain everything.”

Brie groaned as she found a rock under some shade to sit on. “Okay, right, well, there isn’t much we can’t do about it until you deal with her.”

“Uh, how long does it take to get from Hollywood to here?” Billy asked.

Brie shrugged. “Forty minutes, if she finds a bike, and if I know her like I know me, she probably will. You’re going to track her through the app?”

“Yup!”, Freddy said. “Cyborg’ll send us all the coordinate data, assuming people cooperate. Well, we’ve already got a few pings from where we last fought her, so we know it’s working.”

“Great,” Billy said. “So, now we wait, I guess.”

“In the meantime,” Brie asked, “why don’t you tell me all about…other me?”

“Sure thing,” Billy said, setting a timer for 30 minutes on his phone as he also took a seat. “Uh, so, it all started when I was sitting in the Rock of…well, our magic lair…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to read the rest of the story Billy's telling, may I suggest heading on over to the first two parts of this very series? ;)


	6. Earth-Prime, Vasquez Rocks National Park

_Earth-Prime, Vasquez Rocks National Park_ , Half an Hour Later

“…and that’s how we defeated my evil wizard archenemy, saved the elves, and also talked down Dormammu,” Billy said, finishing his tale.

“Wow,” Brie said. “Sounds like you’ve had one heck of a summer.”

“Well, to be honest, we couldn’t have done it without you, or well, other you. Well, other _other_ you that doesn’t want to mash our faces against the nearest hard surface,” Billy said, “So, well, thanks. If not for actually being her, then at least letting me find out that her entire world existed for real.”

“You’re welcome,” she replied. “I hope I get to meet Other Me one day.”

The alarm went off.

“Alright,” Billy said, looking at his phone, “You’ll have to see Other Other you first though. She’s definitely heading up north by the highway thanks to the PSA we recorded and people co-operating. Get somewhere safe, Ms. Larson, we’ll keep a lookout for her.”

He got to his feet, as well as Freddy, scanning the horizon and especially the road for their previous assailant. There was nothing in sight, and no more alerts were forthcoming, at least not for the next few minutes. Vers was definitely en route, but beyond the backdrop of those iconic jagged rocks there wasn’t much of a hint as to how or where she’d turn up.

Billy checked his phone again. “Alright, we’ve got a sighting in the park. Now we just-”

A motorbike, probably commandeered from a now-hapless fellow somewhere in Hollywood – who may have had it coming following a casually sexist remark to the Kree officer earlier – came sailing through the air, smacking right into Billy and Freddy, its smouldering wreck rolling over to a stunned Brie, before it exploded with a fireball, sending her reeling.

Out from the inferno emerged Vers, barely registering the flames and the smoke rising around her, advancing step by step upon Brie, who was backing up and trying to get to her feet, scrambling to stand up even as Vers was mere paces away.

Brie squared up, raising her fists to guard as her doppelganger stared right into her eyes, saying, “Alright, I don’t know who you think you are – or, well, _you_ may not know who you think you are, but you’re messing with the wrong woman here.”

Vers cocked her head, smugly saying, “I think I know who _you_ are at the very least. I was wondering where the ringleader of your little troika was. Nice stunt with the broadcast there, incidentally.”

Brie retorted, “I…really have no clue what that all means, but point is, don’t take another step closer, miss. I _can_ deadlift 450 pounds, and I _can_ hit you with all that force, Kree supercop or otherwise.”

“I’m sure that’s impressive on Earth,” Vers said, “or Skrullos, but you’re dealing with an officer of the Kree Empire here.”

With that, Vers wound her arm back as Brie winced, hoping that it wouldn’t hurt too much, but the prophesied blow never landed as it was caught by Freddy, who shook his head mockingly. Just as Vers processed the implication, Billy smacked the back of her head full-force with his fists, laying her flat out.

The three of them all kind of stared at each other until Billy crouched down to check Vers’ pulse, confirming, “Yeah, she’s still breathing.”

Brie gave him a sidelong glance, asking, “…Is that how superheroes actually fight?”

Freddy and Billy looked at each other for a few long moments as Billy got up, before turning to Brie to answer her query.

“Batman would’ve done something like that.”

“Yeah, we got that move from Batman.”

“Definitely Batman.”

“…Right,” Brie just about managed, asking, “Well, what’re you going to do now?”

Carrying Vers’ barely-conscious form over his shoulders, Billy answered, “First we’re going to the MCU, then taking her back to where in time she belongs. Thanks again, Brie!”

“Yeah,” Freddy added, “Catch you in a minute, Ms. Larson!”

With that, they took off, leaving Brie on the ground waving them farewell, until she realised something.

“Uh, guys?”, she asked, calling after their increasingly distant forms. “Hey, how do I get back? Guys? You kind of forgot something here? _Guys??”_


	7. Earth-199999, Avengers Tower, New York, USA

**Earth-199999**

_Avengers Tower, New York, USA_

Carol Danvers, dressed in little more than a long T-shirt with a frat slogan on it and shorts, picked a lone potato chip out of a bowl, munching on it as she reached out for the bottle of Za! Cola Nil she’d been using to wash them all down as she watched _Shazam Versus The Monster Society Of Evil_ play on her TV, courtesy of the Avengers’ own streaming service subscription.

It wasn’t normally the sort of thing that she’d pick out for herself—give her _Near Dark_ any day of the week—but it was at least nominally in the name of research, given that the people in these movies somehow actually existed in another plane of reality, _and_ somehow had the ability to come over to this world as they well pleased, it seemed.

Peter Parker had suggested this with his usual grating enthusiasm at the last meeting they’d had about this very concern, and while the rest had made a regular event of it, she couldn’t tolerate people yelling at the screen whilst the action was happening. Okay, maybe she couldn’t tolerate _Peter_ yelling at the screen and everyone else whilst the action was happening. Same difference, really.

Captain Shazam…Voltage……Marvel (seriously?)…Thunder was now confronting the main villain, who seemed to be a…little green worm? Why did that ring a bell relating to her last run-in with Billy Batson? He’d mentioned something relating to a mind-controlling worm in Sivana’s eye socket…could it be…?

The question, even rhetorically asked, would have to wait for some other time because her quarters’ living room exploded in a ball of lightning, blowing out all the electricals and sending her reeling, revealing Billy and Freddy…and someone else, slumped over and held up by their elbows by the two superpowered Goonies.

Bewilderment turned into recognition and then anger as she straightened herself up and drew herself up to the trio.

“You can’t just burst into here, you know that?!”, she began furiously. “If you’re going to come over to this universe, the least you could do is-”

“Wait!”, Billy said, “We can explain!”

“You’d damned well better,” Carol said, looking down at their unconscious companion. “Hang on a second, who the hell is _that_?”

Hearing her double’s voice, Carol’s time-shifted alter ego turned her head up, breaking free from Billy and Freddy and blasting them to opposite corners of the room, Billy crashing into the tower cabinet containing Carol’s CDs, and Freddy destroying a houseplant, lunging for Carol and gripping her by the collar of her PARTY NAKED T-shirt.

“Sucker punching me?”, Vers asked testily, “ _Really?_ ”

Carol glared at Billy from the corner of her eye, looking around her own face.

Nodding sheepishly, Billy elaborated, “Time travel. She’s 1995 you, and, um, thinks you’re a Skrull. That one’s on us.”

After a moment’s thought, Carol swung her head forward, (unknowingly) returning Vers’ blow on Billy’s face with a headbutt of her own, and wresting her grip of her novelty T-shirt away by smacking her arms to the sides, slipping behind her and grabbing her in a half-nelson, looking at the cracked, but not yet shattered window.

“Billy,” Carol said, “Window control’s on the side. I’d rather not smash it while I take it outside.”

Billy scrambled to his feet, swiping his finger up and down the side of the window frame until he found the correct button, which opened the window in a matter of seconds even as Vers struggled to break free from her grip.

“Thanks. I won’t be a few minutes,” Carol said to Billy as her eyes lit up, and she took to the skies with her unwilling self.

Explosions of light lit up the midday sky over New York as Billy and Freddy watched in awe at the clash of the Carols, until Vers’ body, pitched with unerring aim, came careening back at them, crashing into the remains of the houseplant that Freddy had landed in. She was followed seconds later by Carol herself, floating with all the dignity she could muster in her somewhat casually dressed state, descending gently back into the ruined room.

“So…time travel?”, she asked Billy.

Freddy spoke up, explaining, “Best as we can understand it, maybe all the timestream meddling you guys – well, not you personally since you weren’t there, but the other Avengers did – must have caused all sorts of weird ripples and displacements, which seem to be so bad that your past self wound up in like, present-day Earth-Prime, and…”

“And with all the shifts in the timestream, it produced all kinds of weird…time tumours…like her presence on your planet?”

“You, uh, could say that,” Billy said.

“ _Right_ ,” Carol said, reaching to sling Vers’ unconscious form over her shoulder, by her arm. “This is a bit outside of my field, but let’s take her to the time nerds downstairs and I’m sure they can figure something out.”

Freddy asked, glancing respectfully at her emblazoned T-shirt, “Uh, you mind asking them while ‘partying naked’? I mean, we don’t, but we’re in our super suits and…”

“Oh yeah,” Carol said, noticing that. “Hold the fort while I get something else to wear. Don’t want the rest to see this trophy.”

“Trophy?”, Billy asked at her retreating form.

“Prize from a boarding school. Bet it’s still being searched for to this day,” she said.

Billy and Freddy looked at each other as they maintained a loose grip on Vers’ limp arms.

“I wouldn’t have guessed that,” Freddy said.

“Me neither,” Billy remarked, looking down at Vers. “Maybe we should ask _her_ about how she got that T-”

“ _Absolutely not_.”


	8. Earth-199999, Avengers Tower, New York, USA

**Earth-199999**

_Avengers Tower, New York, USA_

“A time…aberration?”, Captain America asked, looking at the sedated and restrained Vers in the middle of the lab where he’d met with the other Avengers.

“Yeah,” Carol replied, explaining, “The two geniuses over there found Other Me in _their_ universe for whatever reason, and brought her back here to deal with. Apparently she needs to go back to 1995.”

Sam Wilson blinked in lingering disbelief. “Like, I know you’ve met them a bunch of times and Parker did one, but I’m still coming to terms that the Shazam guys are real, and like, right here with us.”

“Hey, it’s my third time over and I’m still bugged out,” Billy said.

Freddy continued, “As far as I can tell, the fact that she’s not from either our time or our dimension has to mean that her displacement was the result of all the time travel you guys did when you stopped Thanos or when Captain America – uh, Steve Rogers – went back to put all the Infinity Stones back and, well…”

“Proposition Agent Peggy Carter,” Sam added, “leaving me with the shield. And if the butterfly effect only travels forwards in time, then it had to be-”

“His quest to catch up with his senior citizen ex that led to all this,” Carol finished.

“Well, let’s not be so quick to pin that all on him. Tony Stark also went back to before 1995, along with him, to get the Tesseract after Loki bailed with it,” Bruce Banner, aka Professor Hulk explained, “so it could equally be that. And we don’t know enough about time travel even after all this to determine if that’s even the case.”

“I guess that’s fair enough,” Carol said. “What now?”

“I think the first course of action is to figure out precisely when your time double comes from,” Bruce answered, then turning to Billy and Freddy to ask, “What makes you think that she comes from 1995 anyway?”

“Well,” Freddy explained, “she’s dressed like she was at the start of the movie—I mean, like she was in 1995 as far as we can tell—and more importantly, she still thinks she’s an officer of the Kree Empire and not Carol Danvers, Human Being from Earth.”

“We need to know the exact moment I—she dropped out of our Earth’s history though,” Carol said. “Hey, how come if she’s here and not in 1995 I’m still around?”

“Not that kind of time travel,” Bruce said.

“That explains everything and nothing all at once, you realise?”, Sam asked, continuing, “So, how do we find out when precisely she came over? Do we have a mind reader on the team? Does Dr. Strange do that?”

“Not quite,” Bruce answered, “but I think I know who to call. How do we get to Wong again?”

“I’ll call him,” Carol said, pulling out a flip phone and walking off, whilst Sam continued to size up Billy and Freddy, whose attention turned to him in turn.

“Sorry,” Sam said, blinking, “but I’m just still having a hard time figuring out how this is even possible. Here on our Earth you guys exist in a couple of movies, but those have to be written by people with their own imaginations, so how in the multiverse…?”

Billy shrugged, saying, “I put this question to the finest minds we had on our Earth and all they could come up with is that in a possibly infinite set of parallel universes, one of them _had_ to roughly correspond with the version of our lives your guys had written and directed.”

“So, the odds of _these_ versions of ourselves meeting each other…”

“Pretty high actually, given that the magic that brought me here did so _specifically_ because I was imagining your world,” Billy explained.

“Huh, alright,” Sam mused, asking, “What kind of magic?”

“Same magic that turns regular me into _me_ me, I guess,” Billy said. “No idea if it works the same way everywhere.”

Carol returned, with a portal opening behind her. “Well, Wong pulled his strings, and we’re getting a bona fide telepath. She says it ought to work even if I’m— _other_ me—is unconscious, so let’s get started.”

Her guest emerged from behind her, waving at everyone in the conference room.

“Hi, everybody!”, Mantis greeted.


	9. Earth-199999, Avengers Time Travel Facility

_Time Travel Facility, Avengers Tower, NY (USA)_

“Alright,” Mantis said, cracking her knuckles, “Let’s do it!”

“You’re not perturbed in the least that you’re seeing double here?”, Bruce Banner, in the form of Professor Hulk asked, whilst watching her approach the restrained form of Vers.

“Should I?”, she replied. “There’s _much_ weirder out there in the galaxy.”

Bruce shrugged. “You’re probably right. I’ve only been off Earth once. Twice? Well, let’s see whether you get anything useful out of her.”

“Hey,” Freddy interjected, asking, “Mantis, if you read her mind and Captain Marvel’s at the same time, do you hear in stereo?”

Mantis’ eyes lit up as she considered the possibility, reaching over for Carol’s temple before the Avenger, quick as a flash, stopped fitting her arm through the sleeve of her time suit and gripped the Guardian’s wrist with her thumb and index finger, shaking her head.

“I’d rather not, if that’s fine with you,” she said politely, but firmly.

Mantis gave up on the idea, and returned to Vers whilst Carol got her time suit properly on, the empath asking, “What precisely should I be looking for?”

Freddy answered, “Her first memories on my Earth probably have to do with meeting me and Billy on Hollywood Boulevard: lots of tacky buildings, bright sunlight, so maybe try rewinding from that point? Does it work that way?”

“Sorting through someone’s memories isn’t as simple as hitting the button on a cassette player, blue man,” Mantis explained, “but that should do as far as starting points go.”

Billy asked Carol, “I just realised, other you’s about to relive a rather bad experience for you, well, _you_ -you. Are you going to be okay with that?”

“I’ll be fine, Billy,” Carol said with a smile, “but thanks for the concern. I appreciate it.”

“Here goes,” Mantis said, rubbing her palms together before touching Vers’ temples. Her eyes sprung open as she accessed the erstwhile Kree officer’s memories, then shut tight as she focused, trying to sort through them to make some kind of sense of the whole thing.

“Falling…confused…one moment dark as night, the other, bright as day…she sees two people out of place, thinks they’re imposters…”

“Oh, right, that would be us,” Freddy said. “You’ll have to rewind a little.”

Billy could somehow feel her turn her eyes towards them even with her eyelids shut, straining as she said, “I…already told you…it’s not as simple as that…her memory, it’s been altered. Changed. Re-compartmentalised.”

“Changed?”, Billy asked.

Eyes springing open again, she stared through Carol, eerily declaring, “There is a hole…in your head…”

Everyone else in the room gave each other looks, unsure what to make of that.

Carol explained, “I absorbed the energy from a Kree engine core and their Corps abducted and brainwashed me after that, making me think that I was one of them. Thankfully, I had friends to help me remember just what it was they’d tried to erase.”

Everyone gave understanding nods, turning their attention back to Mantis, who droned, “Before her meeting with those imposters she fell from the sky…into a room with shelves full of stories…full of worlds she never made…”

A spark of realisation hitting her, Carol snapped her fingers. “I’ve got it!”

Sam turned to her. “You got something out of all of that?”

“Yeah,” she said. “Blockbuster.”

“Blockbuster?”, he asked.

Freddy spoke up, asking, “What’s that?”

Everyone turned to him now.

“Did I say something wrong?”, he asked.

“No,” Bruce Banner said. “Not really. It’s just something before your time. Video rental shop.”

“Ohh, right,” Freddy said, “So _that’s_ the place she landed in, in the movie. I figured that must’ve been a reference to something of that time.”

“Of that time…”, Sam said, shaking his head. “Well, at least that pins it down to a date, assuming you recalled exactly when the events of your return to Earth happened.”

“Yeah, I do,” Carol replied, heading over to the time travel controls. “Just let me at the console and I’ll punch it in…right…there. You can let her…me…go, Mantis.”

The empath released her hands from Vers’ temples, muttering, “What they did to you…”

“I’ve moved past it,” Carol said, “but thanks for the concern. And for all the help, Mantis. Let’s get me, well, her back to where she belongs.”


	10. Earth-199999 (1995), A Blockbuster somewhere in Los Angeles

**Earth-199999 (1995)**

_A Blockbuster somewhere in Los Angeles_

Carol looked up at the hole in the roof through which she’d fallen so many years ago, gazing at the night sky of two decades past, then down at the self who now had to go through this entire ordeal again, rediscovering all that which had been taken away from her. Well, at least she wouldn’t be alone, and she’d emerge her own woman again after all that.

Gently setting her past self down on the ground, Carol then proceeded to remove a non-invasive injector from the toolbelt on her timesuit, checking its label before pressing the business end against Vers’ neck, carefully infusing the stimulant into her vein. The task done, she sat on the floor between disturbed shelves of rental tapes. She considered her recuperating self, putting together what to say.

Finally, she thought aloud to herself, and herself, “Well, I never expected to be here again, or even to see myself back there. I don’t know how much I can afford to tell you without messing up the timestream, but I think I can tell you that it gets better from here on out. You’ll be meeting people who know you and care about you, even if you don’t know anything about them—well, at first, at least. But the ones who brought you here? Don’t trust them over your friends on this planet.”

Getting up and rematerializing the helmet on her timesuit, she ended with, “I think that’s all I’ve got to say. Good luck out there, and see you—me, whatever—on the other side.” Flashing herself a familiar salute, she activated the time circuits on her suit, and was gone in an instant.

Moments later, Vers came to, getting up at first slowly and unsteadily, then more confidently, and took her first steps in rediscovering herself.


	11. Earth-199999 (Present Day), Time Travel Facility, Avengers Tower

Carol returned to the present, dematerializing her helmet and taking a seat in the laboratory whilst the rest of the Avengers along with Billy and Freddy approached her inquisitively.

“So,” Bruce Banner asked, “Were you able to find it?”

“Like it was yesterday,” Carol said. “I guess since I haven’t vanished from reality yet—

“Once again, not that kind of time travel,” Bruce reiterated.

“ _Regardless_ ,” she pressed on, “There was a me-sized dent in the floor and I left her there, and there wasn’t any indication that there were going to be three Carol Danverses, so I think we were able to triangulate that fine.”

“I guess we’ll probably be seeing her again if it didn’t,” Bruce mused. “Well, well done. I suppose we should get round to sending our brave friends home.”

“Yeah,” Freddy said, “We _had_ planned a full day out in Hollywood…say, could you send us back by like a couple of hours and _then_ teleport us back to our Earth?”

Bruce shook his head. “That sounds like a really bad idea, mainly because then you’d probably wind up running into earlier versions of yourselves, or wind up interfering with whatever everyone else was doing when you were luring Vers to come fight you. We barely know enough about what happens to the timestream over here, let alone on your Earth.”

“Eh, I guess you’re right,” he conceded. “It was worth a shot though.”

“If there isn’t anything else I guess we’re going to have to call Wong again?”, Billy asked.

Carol stepped forth. “Just one moment before I do so.”

Billy shifted his feet uncertainly. “Is this about ruining your apartment here?”

“Nah, don’t worry about that,” she said, smiling. “I just wanted to thank you.”

“For what, precisely?”, Billy asked.

“A little bit of closure on what happened back then, I guess,” Carol said. “It was…good…to talk it through to myself. I think it’d have helped a lot the first time round, knowing that there were people looking out for me.”

“Well, you’re welcome,” he said. “Even if it was pretty much accidental.”

“Seems to me that’s how we’re bound to each other,” Carol said, shrugging her shoulders. “Maybe try giving a little bit more warning next time.”

“No promises!”, Freddy said. “So, our portal home.”

Carol reached for her phone. “Oh, alright, just let me give the Sanctum a call. Still, even given my apartment here, which Pepper’s footing the bill for anyway, it was going seeing you guys again. It’s comforting in its own weird way that we’re not alone out there.”

Sam Wilson spoke up, saying, “Don’t be strangers! I’m still pretty curious how the whole alternate worlds thing works.”

A portal formed in the middle of the laboratory, and Wong stepped out, opening another.

“Well, I would say I’m surprised to see you again so soon,” he said, “But that wouldn’t be even remotely true. One-way ride back to your Earth?”

“You got it,” Billy said, stepping through with Freddy, ending with, “See you guys next time!”

With that, they were gone, returned to their home universe, but almost certainly not finally.


	12. Earth-Prime, Brie Larson’s House

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shazam 2: Wrath of the Gods! Black Adam! Hype!!

**Earth-Prime**

_Brie Larson’s House, Santa Clarita, Los Angeles_

Billy and Freddy, as their super-selves, steeled themselves for the challenge that awaited them. They tensed their arms and planted their elbows on the table, opening their palms to let Brie Larson wrap her fingers around both of them at once as they attempted to simultaneously arm-wrestle her one hand each, all whilst her partner held up a smartphone, ready to film their contest.

“You know, I don’t quite see why we have to do this,” Freddy grumbled.

“Call it compensation for stranding me in the middle of the desert with just a Captain Marvel costume and no handphone,” Brie explained, tightening her grip around Freddy’s hand.

Billy added, “Not to mention the whole unlicensed MCU production thing. By the way, _did_ you get a call from the producers about that?”

“ _Yes I did_ ,” Brie said, “But I redirected them to Victor Stone like you said. I think he said he wanted to get an official Justice League statement from you both after this, though.”

“Oh, holy moly,” Billy cursed, “I guess I’ve got that to look forward to after this. Right then, let’s get started! But why this of all things, Ms. Larson?”

“I’ve always wondered if I _could_ square up to one of you guys, especially since I didn’t quite get to fight my movie version earlier,” she said, “and if nothing else, it’ll make a great video for my channel—Captain Marvel vs. ‘Captain Marvel’, you know?”

“And Powerstorm too,” Freddy said, “So are you going to count down or something?”

Brie turned to her partner, asking, “Babe?”

“You got it. On 3, 2, 1—

Biceps and forearms strained as Brie tried bringing both her palms together and onto the table and Billy on one hand and Freddy on the other doing their best to prevent that from happening. While in most normal circumstances this would’ve been an incredibly lopsided battle, Billy and Freddy were simultaneously being very conscious of their own strength whilst being somewhat less aware of how much Ms. Larson liked to pump iron.

“Wow,” Billy wheezed, “You weren’t kidding when you said you could bench 450 pounds.”

Focusing on her own struggle, Brie said, “Deadlift. Well, I put in the hours and I’m glad to see them pay off.”

“Yeah, you don’t say,” Freddy grunted as he tried leaning into his arm. “You realise we could be here for a while.”

“Yeah,” Brie said.

Minutes dragged by, and progress could be measured at millimetres at a time, and the realisation that they were essentially at an impasse. This didn’t stop Brie’s partner from circling around them making with a crude orbital shot whilst also layering commentary on their contest.

“What’re you doing there?”, Brie asked.

“Oh,” her partner said. “I figured we could intercut it at various points, add some music…”

“We’ve gone on long enough for them to discuss _post-production?_ ”, Freddy hissed at Billy.

Billy said, “Yeah, and while we _could_ end this super quick I kind of don’t want to break their table or anything else in the room, so, well…”

Freddy nodded. “I get it. My pride can take a hit, sure. In 3…2…1…”

Both Billy and Freddy threw the fight in that instant, releasing all tension in their arms and letting Brie slam the backs of their hands into her table, clutching them in melodramatic agony as she shot to her feet in triumph, giving her partner a high-five afterwards on their free hand.

“Oh, what an unforeseen result!”, Billy cried, mugging for the camera.

Freddy screamed, “A flea…has felled…a lion!”, massaging his wrist in seeming pain.

“And that’s how it’s done!”, Brie shouted triumphantly. “Thanks, guys, for your, uh, virtuoso performances.”

“Anytime,” Billy said. “I can’t wait to see this once it streams!”

“One unlicensed production for another,” Freddy mused. “The Justice League is just going to love this.”

“Eh, don’t worry about that,” Brie said. “That’s one of the conditions he gave to smooth this whole thing over. Soon, everyone in the region will get a sneak peek at the battle of the century.”

“Wait, _everyone_?”, Billy asked.

Freddy laughed. “Oh man, you’re in _so much trouble_ when Mary sees this!”

Billy massaged his forehead with his fingertips, grumbling, “You know, I thought the worst part of the day was getting my face smashed in by Captain Marvel.”

Freddy nodded musing, “Even _she_ hath no fury than a Mary told you were playing truant, it’s true…”


	13. Epilogue: Earth-Prime, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end!
> 
> For now.

_Philadelphia, Pennsylvania_

Billy landed back in his hometown, already dreading the fresh hell from Mary which he was going to get once he switched back to his usual teenaged self and regained his phone. Well, maybe that was a reason to put _that_ off as late as possible.

Not like he had much in the way to things to do for the rest of the day, seeing as his plans for today with Freddy had been completely upended by Carol and Brie’s Kree-brainwashed doppelgänger, so he might as well take a nice stroll back to his pad, and heck, maybe sign an autograph or two for whoever recognised him on the street. That was the fun part.

All that changed when a portal open and someone stumbled out, sword drawn and wildly slashing in front of him, screaming to the heavens.

Hoping it wasn’t some sort of magic blade that could slice his arm off, Billy recovered from his sheer shock just quickly enough to parry it and divert its edge away from his face, sliding his wrist along its flat to yank it out of his mysterious assailant’s grasp, whereupon the other guy proceeded to collapse like a sack of potatoes into Billy’s arms, all his energy apparently spent in his futile attack.

Billy’s defeated assailant craned his neck up, staring blearily in his general, murmuring “For…Asgard…”

Fandral, hero of numerous realms, then passed out.

Billy stood dumbfounded as he tried to stabilise the MCU’s latest time-space aberration into his universe, with really only one thought resonating in his head.

_Aw, crap. What do I do now?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will we see what happens when Zachary Levi starts talking to himself??* Only time will tell!
> 
> Till then, stay safe and be cool, everyone!
> 
> *Sorry, Josh Dallas


End file.
